By Vincent D’Silva

JOHOR BAHRU: In the quiet corners of a school, beyond the clang of classroom bells and the hurried footsteps of students rushing between lessons, there exists another kind of classroom—one without chalkboards or exams. It is a space where words are sometimes whispered, where tears occasionally fall, and where lives quietly change.

For Md Zali Abu, counsellor at SMK Impian Emas, this has been his world for more than two decades.

With 23 years of experience in school counselling, Md Zali has spent much of his career listening to stories that rarely appear in textbooks—stories of grief, anger, loneliness, and resilience. Yet his own journey into counselling began long before he stepped into the counselling room.

“I began my career in 1994 as an academic teacher in a primary school in Rompin, Pahang,” he recalled.

“Most of my students were from the Jakun Orang Asli community. Many of them had little exposure to education or a clear sense of their future career paths.”

Standing before children whose lives were shaped by limited opportunities left a lasting impression on the young teacher. He soon realised that education alone was not enough; what many of his students needed most was encouragement and guidance.

“From that experience, I felt called to learn more about counselling,” he said. “I wanted to understand how to influence thinking in a positive way—not only for students, but also for their parents.”

Determined to deepen his understanding, Md Zali pursued a Distance Learning Degree Programme in Psychology and Communication at Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia while continuing to teach. He graduated in 2001 and, two years later, was appointed as a full-time Guidance and Counselling Teacher.

Since then, his career has been shaped by moments both heartbreaking and inspiring.

One memory in particular still lingers in his heart.

“There was a male student whose father passed away on the morning of his SPM examination,” he said softly. “The boy was overwhelmed with grief and did not want to attend school.”

Instead of waiting for the student to come, Md Zali went to him.

“I went to his house to support him emotionally,” he said. “After speaking with him and helping him calm down, I brought him to school so he could sit for the exam.”

The young student eventually completed his SPM—and passed.

“That moment reminded me how fragile yet strong our students can be,” Md Zali reflected. “Sometimes they just need someone to walk beside them during their darkest hours.”

Over the years, the nature of students’ struggles has evolved. Today, Md Zali says emotional management has become one of the most pressing challenges among young people.

“Many students act based on their emotions without thinking about the risks. Anxiety and daily stress are increasingly common. That is why mental health screenings in schools are so important,” he explained.

Some students, he noted, struggle with family problems that affect their behaviour in school. Others face isolation among peers or difficulties accepting advice from parents and teachers.

“Most cases referred to counselling involve negative behaviours that eventually affect academic performance or lead to truancy,” he said. “Often, the root of the problem lies at home.”

Another powerful force shaping students today is social media.

“Almost every student owns a gadget and has access to social media. For students who lack a strong sense of identity, social media can easily influence their emotions,” Md Zali said.

Online comparisons, misinformation and cyberbullying have become silent pressures many students carry with them into the classroom.

“Students sometimes measure their worth against what they see online. If they cannot filter the information they receive, it can affect their emotional stability,” he said.

Yet for all the visible challenges, Md Zali believes many struggles remain hidden.

“Students often keep their emotional problems to themselves. But attentive counsellors can detect signs through changes in behaviour,” he said.

A student who was once cheerful may suddenly become withdrawn. Another may grow unusually aggressive or sensitive.

“If emotional problems are suppressed for too long, they eventually affect academic performance and school attendance,” he said.

At the heart of effective counselling, he believes, lies something simple yet profound: trust.

“Trust begins with rapport,” Md Zali explained. “We start conversations with light topics to make students feel comfortable. They must feel safe before they can talk about their problems.”

Confidentiality, careful choice of words, and even body language play vital roles in building that trust.

“When students trust you, they open up,” he said. “Only then can we help them see their problems clearly and find solutions.”

Among the many students he has guided, one story continues to stand out.

The boy came from a troubled family background, where frequent conflicts at home shaped his behaviour in school.

“He was actually a quiet student with good academic ability. But when classmates disturbed him, he would become extremely aggressive,” Md Zali said.

Sometimes, the anger would erupt so violently that he smashed classroom windows by throwing objects at them.

Through several counselling sessions, Md Zali worked patiently with the student to help him understand and manage his emotions.

“He eventually learned how to control his anger and set clear goals for his future,” Md Zali said.

The transformation was remarkable.

The student went on to achieve excellent SPM results—and today, he serves as a doctor at Hospital Sultanah Aminah in Johor Bahru.

“For a counsellor, moments like that remind us why we chose this path,” Md Zali said with quiet pride.

Still, the work is not without its challenges.

Parents often place high expectations on counsellors to ensure their children succeed academically. At the same time, counsellors must navigate sensitive cases involving trauma, abuse, or severe family conflicts.

“We must balance empathy with professional responsibility,” he said.

Behind the scenes, counsellors also juggle heavy workloads—from preparing reports for school administrators to organising programmes that address students’ psychosocial, academic and career development.

Yet Md Zali believes the responsibility of nurturing emotionally healthy children does not rest on counsellors alone.

“In child development, parents and teachers play a crucial role. Children grow within emotional support systems built by those closest to them,” he said.

He encourages parents and teachers to avoid comparing children with others and instead recognise their efforts.

“When children grow in a safe and supportive environment, their emotions become more stable,” he said.

Even counsellors, he added, must care for their own mental well-being.

“Listening to other people’s problems can affect us emotionally,” he admitted. “That is why counsellors practise self-care—rest, reflection, and sometimes seeking advice from colleagues.”

For adolescents struggling with loneliness or self-doubt, his message remains simple but powerful.

“Students need to know that someone cares about them. Feelings of loneliness are temporary. With time, support, and the courage to connect with others, they will find their place,” Md Zali said.

And in the quiet counselling room of SMK Impian Emas, where countless young voices have found the courage to speak, Md Zali Abu continues to listen—patiently guiding fragile hearts toward hope, one conversation at a time.